When you’re incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn’t cute or funny

New Rule: George Bush has to stop laughing at himself. When you’re incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn’t cute or funny. You know, there’s a guy who’s been running around the country pretending he’s the president, and I believe his name is George Bush. And he wants everyone to know that he doesn’t … Continue reading “When you’re incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn’t cute or funny”

Do you people have to ruin everything?

New Rule: Keep Jesus out of strip clubs. A former dancer from Las Vegas has founded “JC’s Girls,” a ministry that brings the healing power of the Lord directly to America’s strip clubs and adult businesses. Do you people have to ruin everything? You’ve got the White House, the Congress, the Supreme Court. Can’t you … Continue reading “Do you people have to ruin everything?”

Here’s how it works

But, listen, let’s review the rules. Here’s how it works. The president makes decisions, he’s the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Put them through a spell check and go home. Get to know your family again. Make love to your … Continue reading “Here’s how it works”

Deck Chairs

So the white house has personnel changes. Then you write they’re just rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. First of all, that is a terrible metaphor. This ships not sinking. This administration is soaring. If anything, they are rearranging the deck chairs on the Hindenburg… — Stephen Colbert (White House Correspondent’s Dinner: April 29, … Continue reading “Deck Chairs”

A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to religion

(printed by fortune in one of my terminal windows today) A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to religion. Subjects are less apprehensive of illegal treatment from a ruler whom they consider godfearing and pious. On the other hand, they do less easily move against him, believing that he has the gods … Continue reading “A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to religion”

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