Last 30 Quotes of the Day

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27 Jun 2022

I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment.
-- Gotama Buddha


26 Jun 2022

Inspector Clay is dead! Murdered! And someone's responsible!
-- Detective (Plan 9 from Outer Space)


25 Jun 2022

Weather forcast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
-- George Carlin


24 Jun 2022

Never hurts to have a second set of prints on a gun.
-- Nelson Muntz


23 Jun 2022

Barry, there is no hell. There is only France.
-- Frank Zappa, "You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore"


22 Jun 2022

We are Sex Bob-omb. We are here to sell out and make money and stuff.
-- Kim Pine


21 Jun 2022

Oh, so, just 'cause a robot wants to kill humans that makes him a radical?
-- Bender Unit 22


20 Jun 2022

No proper program contains an indication which as an operator-applied occurrence identifies an operator-defining occurrence which as an indication-applied occurrence identifies an indication-defining occurrence different from the one identified by the given indication as an indication-applied occurrence.
-- ALGOL 68 Report


19 Jun 2022

In the game of chess you can never let your adversary see your pieces.
-- Captain Zapp Brannigan


18 Jun 2022

Like most of life's problems, this one can be solved with bending.
-- Bender Unit 22


17 Jun 2022

All science is either physics or stamp collecting.
-- Ernest Rutherford


16 Jun 2022

Someday, I want to go to a site that proclaims a miracle and see a real miracle, like a pie miraculously floating above my keyboard, or a MySpace page that doesn't look like technicolor vomit.
-- PZ Myers


15 Jun 2022

After [Benjamin] Franklin came a herd of Electrical Pioneers whose names have become part of our electrical terminology: Myron Volt, Mary Louise Amp, James Watt, Bob Transformer, etc. These pioneers conducted many important electrical experiments. For example, in 1780 Luigi Galvani discovered (this is the truth) that when he attached two different kinds of metal to the leg of a frog, an electrical current developed and the frog's leg kicked, even though it was no longer attached to the frog, which was dead anyway. Galvani's discovery led to enormous advances in the field of amphibian medicine. Today, skilled veterinary surgeons can take a frog that has been seriously injured or killed, implant pieces of metal in its muscles, and watch it hop back into the pond just like a normal frog, except for the fact that it sinks like a stone.
-- Dave Barry, "What is Electricity?"


14 Jun 2022

Adventure is just bad planning.
-- Roald Amundsen


13 Jun 2022

In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty.
-- Thomas Jefferson


12 Jun 2022

I'm swelling with patriotic mucus!
-- Doctor John A. Zoidberg


11 Jun 2022

One of the great attractions of patriotism - it fulfills our worst wishes. In the person of our nation we are able, vicariously, to bully and cheat. Bully and cheat, what's more, with a feeling that we are profoundly virtuous.
-- Aldous Huxley


10 Jun 2022

If you laid all of our laws end to end, there would be no end.
-- Mark Twain


09 Jun 2022

Every Christmas my mom would get a fresh goose, for gooseburgers, and my dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes.
-- Phillip J. Fry


08 Jun 2022

It ain't over till it's over.
-- Yogi Berra


07 Jun 2022

When people learn no tools of judgment and merely follow their hopes, the seeds of political manipulation are sown.
-- Stephen Jay Gould


06 Jun 2022

I have to admit I have a monkey on my back. It represents my crippling addiction to monkeys.
-- Stephen Colbert (via Twitter)


05 Jun 2022

Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.
-- Frank Zappa


04 Jun 2022

On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time.
-- George Orwell


03 Jun 2022

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
-- Groucho Marx


02 Jun 2022

You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
-- Will Rogers


01 Jun 2022

We're talking about whether any independent contractors working on the uncompleted death star were innocent victims when the rebels destroyed it.
-- Dante Hicks


31 May 2022

A moral choice in its basic terms appears to be a choice that favors survival: a choice made in favor of life.
-- Ursula K. Le Guin


30 May 2022

I can imagine no greater misfortune for a cultured people than to see in the hands of the rulers not only the civil, but also the religious power.
-- Caius Valerius Catullus


29 May 2022

You have just destroyed one model XQJ-37 nuclear powered pansexual roto-plooker....and you're gonna have to pay for it.
-- Frank Zappa


Now I am depressed...

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